October
7th, Feast of the Most Holy Rosary
Today is the great feast of our
Lady of the Most Holy Rosary. This feast commemorates the most important naval
battle in human history – a battle which, if lost, would have left Rome as the
new Istanbul and St. Peter’s as a second Hagia Sophia.
For the history of this feast,
consider a good article from Catholic Culture [here],
and the poem of G.K. Chesterton [here].
Our Lady has saved the world
through the Rosary, and she desires to do so again. More particularly, in our
own day, there can be no doubt that our Lady wants to save the world through
the Family Rosary. But how can a family succeed in the practice of the Family
Rosary?
Two
excellent articles on praying the Rosary as a family
First, an article for moms, from
Leila Lawler [here].
Go read this article, men and women both. It is so good! Here are some of the
point Leila makes (in my own words):
1. Be patient! It’s ok if you are struggling with keeping
the kids focused. God understands!
2. The man of the house should lead the Rosary – at least,
he should announce the mysteries.
3. Small beginnings! Don’t start with five decades all on
your knees. Rather, build from something as small as a Creed, three Hail Marys,
and a Glory Be. Take the whole month of October if necessary. Build slowly –
then pray the Rosary for the rest of your lives!
4. Don’t use prayer time as teaching time! This isn’t
catechism or CCD, this is a time for prayer. Certainly, the kids will learn a
lot about their faith through praying the Rosary – but, when you pray, you
should be talking to God, not talking to your kids. Thus, when you announce the
mysteries, be praying rather than lecturing. [read her article for more on this
point]
5. Don’t get discouraged!
Second, an article for dads,
from Taylor Marshall [here].
Go read this article, men and women both. It is so good!
1. Pray the Rosary in the same place (a small chapel or
prayer area with icons, statues, and Crucifix), at the same time, every day.
2. Adjust the setting for prayer – dim the lights, light a
candle, etc.
3. Dad should kneel for all (or at least some) of the Rosary
– he sets the example.
4. End by invoking the patron saints of all the members of
the family (maybe have each child invoke his own saints, as able).
5. Build the habit of the Rosary gradually. Start with one
decade for a week, then go to three, then five.
Fr.
Ryan’s thoughts on the Family Rosary
Though I could give many tips
on praying the Rosary as a family, I will limit myself to five – based on the
questions: Who?, What?, When?, Where?, Why? I will attempt to make some points
which can be added to those already made above.
1)
Who?
Who should be praying the Family Rosary?
It seems that we can sometimes get hung up on the thought
that, if not everyone is present, it doesn’t really count as a “family” Rosary.
This is not helpful – it is letting the perfect become the enemy of the good.
Younger children (especially those between two and six) may
not be able to stay for the entire Rosary. They should certainly be encouraged
to do so – and it is ok to give them some reward for joining the family for the
whole Rosary (perhaps an extra book read to them at night?) – but we ought not
to be too upset if a three-year-old has a hard time sitting still for around
twenty-five minutes of prayer.
One idea, which may work, is to gradually build the habit of
the Rosary in the child. Have all the kids stay for at least the first decade.
Perhaps a three or four-year-old can lead this, and then he can go play (quietly!).
Let the five or six-year-old lead the second decade, and then he can go play
too (or perhaps he can leave after the third decade).
It does seem that most children from seven on up should be
able to stay for the whole Rosary most of the time. But there is no reason why
all the kids should have to kneel, or even stay upright through the entire
Rosary – here again, some sore of gradual habit-building may work. Let the
children sit and be comfortable for the decade that they are not leading (or have
them only kneel for the third joyful mystery, the fifth sorrowful, the first
glorious, and the fourth luminous, since these are the central mysteries of
each set).
Finally, it may happen that occasionally (or even often) one
of the parents is unable to be present for the Family Rosary. That’s ok! That’s
life! It still counts as a Family Rosary (for those who are present). This may
be especially difficult in a mixed marriage, but the Catholic parent should
still persevere and lead the Rosary with the children (as best as possible).
2)
What? Exactly what should we be thinking about during the Family
Rosary?
The father should announce the mysteries – if he is not
present, then let the mother do so. He shouldn’t simply give the name of the
mystery, but should rather call to mind some of the central points of each
mystery.
Further, it will be good to speak to Jesus during the
opening of each mystery. Take this for example: “The third sorrowful mystery,
The Crowning with Thorns. Our Savior, having been whipped and mocked, receives a
crown not of gold but of piercing thorns. The thorns cut into his forehead and
cause unspeakable pain to our Lord. Oh my good Jesus! You have suffered a crown
of thorns out of love for me! Your merciful eyes, filled with both blood and
tears, looked upon your persecutors with the greatest tenderness and love. Let
me then love you! Let me bear every humiliation and hardship out of love for
you. When others mock me or hurt me, let me love them just as you love them! Oh
my gentle Jesus! Let my heart be so emptied of pride and self-love as to be
filled with the purifying fire of your love for souls!”
This is not CCD, this is prayer-time. The goal is to use our
intellects in the consideration of the love of God revealed in these mysteries
so as to arouse our wills to great acts of love in return.
3)
When? What time of day is best for the Rosary?
Though many families find that the night is a good time for
the Rosary, I will always insist that the morning is the time of the day which
is most suited to prayer. The early morning, especially, is a time when the
children will be quieter and less apt to horse-play. Certainly, they (and may
you too) will be tired, but all the saints tell us that the morning is the time
for prayer – why not instill this in your children through a morning Rosary?
Personally, I think that the parents ought to get up another
half hour earlier, so as to make some time for mental prayer even before the
Family Rosary.
4)
Where? Is there any reason why the Rosary should be said in one
place over another?
You will never succeed in praying the Rosary well, without
having a place in the house especially designated to prayer. It may not be an
entire chapel, but at least a prayer-spot is needed. If you have a place for
the TV, you should have a place for the Crucifix and a statue of Mary (and,
perhaps, some icons).
If the Family Rosary is said in a special place (especially
if it is said in a special room) which is only used for prayer, this will be a
great help in focusing the children. Further, the parents themselves will
realize that even adults need to have a special place for prayer – that is why we
say Mass in churches rather than gymnasiums, and why we don’t allow coffee. No
food or gum or toys during the Family Rosary! (but do be patient with the
littlest ones)
5)
Why?
A final thought on why your family should pray the Rosary every day.
Why should any family make the effort to pray the Rosary
every day? First of all, don’t worry if you don’t manage to pray the Rosary
quite every single day! We are still human! But do be sure to pray it every
Saturday, and especially to point out First Saturdays to the children.
Why pray the Rosary every day?
Because Mother Church wants you to: The Church grants a
plenary indulgence to those who pray the Family Rosary. There is no great sign
of approval and encouragement than this! Read my earlier article on this [here].
Because Bl. John Paul II wants you to: “As a prayer for
peace, the Rosary is also, and always has been, a prayer of and for the family.
[…] We need to return to the practice of family prayer and prayer for families,
including the Rosary. […] The Holy Rosary, by age-old tradition, has shown
itself particularly effective as a prayer which brings the family together. […]
The family that recites the Rosary together reproduces something of the
atmosphere of the household of Nazareth.” (Rosarium
Virginis Mariae, n. 41)
Because it will save your family: “The family that prays
together stays together.” This was first used in relation to the Family Rosary,
by Fr. Patrick Peyton! If you pray the Rosary as a family, and if you recite it
with devotion (not simply hurrying through as fast as possible, but saying it
with love), your family will not only remain united on earth (according to God’s
plan), but you will all be happily re-united for all eternity in heaven!
Our
Lady of the Most Holy Rosary, Pray for us!
"The early morning, especially, is a time when the children will be quieter and less apt to horse-play." I agree, this is probably the way to go.
ReplyDeleteMy memory of the family rosary as a child: Having a great time playing outside with my friends in the summer twilight only to be called in to say the Rosary. Sad to say, it rendered the Rosary obnoxious to me for years. As a result, in raising my own children the family rosary was not part of the program- for fear of turning them off on the Rosary and the faith.
However, in the evening we did read the Chronicles of Narnia ( or some other good secular literature) for half an hour, a good book length life of a saint for half an hour, and studied the Baltimore Catechism for 20 minutes. After that, the Salve Regina or the Shield of St. Patrick and off to bed you go. We had a prayerful, peaceful, quiet home . . . and Our Lady was part of it.
Also, until the kids were about ten or eleven, every time they wanted to go out to play, we would pray with them a spontaneous prayer asking for their physical safety and then would take the opportunity to load them down with blessings from here to eternity. It would happen two or three times a day, their running up to us and saying, "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, would you pray with me? I want to go out to play!"
All of this I say by way of indicating to young parents that saying the family Rosary is not the only way to go. It may be the best, but there is such a thing as letting the best become the enemy of the good. Better a steady rhythm of prayer in the home than sporadic, ill-thought-out attempts at the family rosary.
Whats your opinion on the scriptural rosary with Kids? Do you think that it extends the time too much?
ReplyDeleteThe rosary demands a lot of attention from attention-challenged little kids, 'tis true. I prefer the chaplet of Divine Mercy. Even that can be difficult, because it is repetitive, but it doesn't take too long.
ReplyDeleteWhen doing the rosary with my young son, usually I will only do a decade or two. If we are driving in the car on the way to school, I will announce the mystery number, and ask if he can name it. 'The fifth glorious mystery is?" And then, just a brief scriptural or liturgical quote or prayer, now that he understands what the particular mysteries refer to, e.g.: 'O Mary conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee.'
The most wonderful thing about being a father is getting to pass on the faith, in my opinion. It is more satisfying than anything else I can think of that I do.
yan
If your wife does not wear a burqa, thank a Catholic.
ReplyDeleteIf you do not have to descend to a prayer mat five times a day, thank a Catholic
If you do not have to pay the Jizya, thank a Catholic.
If you do not have to make the Hajj, thank a Catholic.
If you do not think that Mahomet was a prophet, thank a Catholic for it wasn't the protestants or the Jews who stopped the Mahometans